Before You Give Up, Read This

Reflection: 

Lately I’ve been thinking a lot about how easy it is to feel like you’re behind. You’ve been putting in the work but when you look at where you are compared to where you thought you’d be there’s still a gap and honestly that can be frustrating. If I’m being honest as I write this, I’ve felt that myself recently… a lot.

I’m coming up on a year in business and while a lot of good things have happened there are still plenty of moments where I think, I thought I’d be further along by now. That thought can mess with you if you let it. You start wondering if you’re doing something wrong, you start comparing yourself to other people and you start questioning whether all the work you’ve been putting in is actually going anywhere. Sometimes you may even start thinking about giving up. But here is something I’ve been reminding myself that is pretty simple: maybe I’m not failing, maybe I just haven’t gotten there yet.

I think we forget how long some things actually take. We see someone who has built a successful business, transformed their body, mastered a skill or created a life they’re proud of and we usually see the end result. We don’t see all the time that came before it. We don’t see the months where they weren’t getting clients, the workouts where they didn’t feel stronger or the days where they questioned themselves. We don’t see the boring stuff and there is a lot of boring stuff behind anything meaningful.

One of the biggest things I’ve realized this past year is that consistency really isn’t that exciting. People talk about consistency like it’s this huge, powerful thing but most of the time it’s just doing normal stuff over and over again. It’s the Tuesday where nothing exciting happens. You wake up, do the work, handle whatever needs to be handled and keep pushing. Nobody is clapping for you, there’s no huge breakthrough and you might not even feel like you accomplished much but you did what you said you were going to do. Then you do it again tomorrow and then again and again.

That’s the part people don’t really see when they talk about success. They see the result but not the hundreds or thousands of ordinary days that created it. If you’re in a season of life where nothing seems to be happening, that doesn’t necessarily mean nothing is happening you could just be in the middle of it and being in the middle is hard because you don’t have the benefit of hindsight yet. You can’t look back and see how everything is connected. You just have to keep moving forward without knowing exactly when it’s going to pay off.

With that said I also have been thinking about the difference between discipline and commitment. I think a lot of people use those words interchangeably but they’re really not the same thing. Discipline is doing the thing today. Commitment is deciding you’re going to keep doing the thing even when today doesn’t go well. That’s important because your discipline is going to fluctuate, you’re going to have good weeks and bad weeks. There will be days where you’re locked in and days where you don’t want to do anything. That’s normal.

The question isn’t whether you’re going to feel motivated every day because you won’t. The question is whether you’ve actually decided that this is something you’re willing to stick with. That’s where commitment comes in. If you’re committed to something one bad day doesn’t change the plan, one setback doesn’t erase everything you’ve already done. You can have a bad day and still be committed and I think that’s a much more realistic way to look at it.

Over time you also start to figure out what you’re actually good at. What comes naturally to you, what you enjoy and what you can spend hours doing without realizing how much time has passed. That’s what I think of when I hear the idea of a “zone of genius." I think that’s part of why this past year has felt slower than I expected. I’ve been building a lot of skills and not all of them are necessarily the things I feel like I’m best at but I’m learning and I don’t think you can figure that stuff out if you quit every time something feels slow. Sometimes you have to stay in the process long enough for things to start making sense.

Think about something you quit a year ago or two years ago.. maybe even five years ago. What would your life look like now if you had just kept going? Maybe it wouldn’t have worked. That’s possible. But maybe it would have. You don’t really know and that’s the frustrating part. Sometimes we quit because we decide something isn’t working when in reality we just haven’t given it enough time. I know there are things I’ve stopped in my life that I sometimes wonder about. Not necessarily because I regret the decision but because I wonder what would’ve happened if I had stayed a little longer. That’s something worth thinking about before you walk away from something you genuinely care about. Are you actually done with it or are you just frustrated with how long it’s taking? Those are two very different things.

I don’t know what you’re working toward right now. Maybe it’s something big, maybe it’s something nobody else even knows you’re trying to do but if you’re frustrated because you haven’t gotten there yet, try not to let that frustration convince you that you never will. You might just need more time. It could take another year. It could take five. It could take longer than you originally imagined but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t keep going. If you genuinely care about it give yourself the chance to find out what happens if you stay. Keep having the boring Tuesdays, keep learning, keep getting a little better, keep showing up when you can and when your discipline isn’t there, remember why you committed in the first place.

You don’t need to have everything figured out right now. You just need to decide whether you’re willing to keep going because maybe you’re not behind and maybe you’re not failing. You’re just somewhere in the middle of the process, and if you stay a little longer, you’ll eventually look back and realize you were a lot closer than you thought.

So before you give up, ask yourself one question: What am I committed to and what if I just stayed?

⚔️ Weekly Challenge

Choose one thing you’ve been thinking about giving up on because it hasn’t happened as quickly as you wanted. Instead of quitting this week, commit to showing up for it. Do the work, even if you don’t see the results yet and at the end of the week, ask yourself: What could happen if I just continued to stay and work toward what I want?

⚔️ Step into the Forge. Listen, reflect and grow.

This week we’re asking a simple question: What if you just stayed?

When you’re frustrated because you’re not where you thought you’d be, it’s easy to feel behind or want to give up but maybe you’re not failing. Maybe you just haven’t gotten there yet. This episode is about consistency, commitment, the “boring Tuesdays" and trusting the process long enough to see what you’re capable of.

Hit play on YouTube below or listen on Spotify.

Ready? Step into the Forge. ⚔️

MindForge Podcast Episode 17 Link: https://open.spotify.com/episode/3GtXmclArYvwQTLjfdC1wm 

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